19 CALL JASON ON 02 4324 5577 | A 334 Mann St, Gosford NSW 2250 | E gosford@roadsmartfleet.com.au Unlock peak fleet performance WITH ROADSMART FLEET–GOSFORD Expert passenger fleet services • Tailored vehicle servicing packages. • Proactive maintenance schedules. • Minimise downturn, maximise productivity. Truck tyre fleet maintenance • Specialised commercial Tyre maintenance. • 24/7 emergency breakdown support. • Product optimisation tailored to your needs. At Roadsmart Fleet - Gosford, we partner with you to give a unique customer experience on a Fleet Management level. We are experts in our field and are trusted by local and nationally recognised brands. AN ACCOUNTANT IS walking down the street when he comes across a man who says, “Spare some loose change?” “And why should I do that?” asks the accountant. “Because I’m broke. Haven’t got a dollar to my name and nothing to eat,” says the man. “I see,” says the accountant. “And how does this compare to the same quarter last year?” I quit my position as a scuba diving instructor the first day of the job. Deep down, I realised it wasn’t for me. A guy goes into a pub and orders 7 pints of beer. He drinks the first pint, the third pint, the 5th and the 7th pint, and gets up to leave. The barman says, “Why are you not drinking the other three pints?” He says, “Doctor’s orders.”“What do you mean by that?” asks the barman. “I am on medication and my doctor said the odd pint is okay.” A man joins a big corporate as a trainee. On his very first day at work, he dials the kitchen and shouts into the phone, “Get me a coffee, quickly!” The voice from the other side responded, “You fool you’ve dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you’re talking to, dumbo?” “No,” replied the trainee. “It’s the CEO of the company, you fool!” The trainee shouts back, “And do you know who YOU are talking to, you fool?!” “No,” replied the CEO indignantly. “Good!” replied the trainee, and slams down the phone. A man passes away and his funeral is set to be held in his hometown where one of his sons lives. The other son, a wealthy businessman, unfortunately can’t make it to the ceremony so instead he offers to pay for the entire thing. A few months later, the businessman is looking over his finances and notices a recurring bill of $120 a month. Confused, he called up his brother and asks him if he knows anything about it. “Oh yeah,” the brother replies. “Dad always wanted to go out in style so we rented him a tuxedo.” Quote of the month “Management is about persuading people to do things they do not want to do, while leadership is about inspiring people to do things they never thought they could.” Steve Jobs I’ll never forget the look on the cashiers face, when she scanned the packet of bird seed, And I asked her how long does it take for the birds to grow once I plant them. A politician visited a remote little rural village and asked the inhabitants what the government could do for them. “We have two big needs,” said the village headman. “First, we have a hospital but no doctor.” The politician whipped out his mobile phone, spoke for a while and then said: “I have sorted it out. A doctor will arrive here tomorrow. What is your other need?”“We have no mobile reception at all in our village.” FUNNY BUSINESS CENTRAL COAST BUSINESS REVIEW FEBRUARY 2025
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