words can easily arouse a desire to experience what is spoken of. Now, regarding nutrition, we must eat to survive, and so, to speak of food is perfectly legitimate. The act of procreation, however, is not necessary for individual existence, but for the longevity of the race. This longevity is dependent not only on the act of procreation, but also on its manner and time. It matters little if you eat this or that at this time or that time, but carnal union is possible with only one person, and that in specific circumstances that preserve its intimacy. Therefore, one must take great care not to arouse that instinct in others, unless in the proper context with one’s spouse. The practical consequences of this are that one should not speak of the sexual organs, nor should one refer to persons or events or actions that would lead naturally to thinking about them. This is also why St Paul warns the Ephesians: Fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not so much as be named among you, as becometh saints (Eph. 5:3). Chastity in words includes choosing the right words when one has to refer to such things. It is indicative of an overly sexualised society that one not infrequently hears reference to these things using words that in former times would have remained veiled. For example, people often refer to “having sex”, but this expression, by its explicit reference to copulation which is common to all animals, does not leave any space for the proper protection of intimacy. Our elders would have used other expressions such as the “marital embrace” or “conjugal relations”, much like God Himself does by using the verb “to know” when referring to Adam and Eve’s first union as man and wife. In the same way, it is sadly rather common to hear reference to the organs of reproduction using their anatomical names, whereas chaste persons tend to prefer such expressions as “private parts”. It is one of the tactics of the enemy to get people accustomed to sinning by breaking down the social barriers to mentioning them. In a word, when people have the word “sex” frequently on their lips, they have it frequently on their minds, which increases temptations and leads to thinking that sinning is normal. This is why St Francis de Sales was able to write: “Purity has its source in the heart, but it is in the body that its material results take shape, and therefore it may be forfeited both by the exterior senses and by the thoughts and desires of the heart. All lack of modesty in seeing, hearing, speaking, smelling or touching, is impurity, especially when the heart takes pleasure therein”.15 46
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